Once Upon A Purple Time...

It's the Starter Tie this evening for Brian Williams: a solid matte silk cravat of violet. It's easy to think of its namesake, that lovely messenger of the season, appearing so vivid and bold among the early green of Spring's coverlets. I remember so well being charmed by violets; I dug a few clumps and lovingly transplanted them to my own side yard, knowing I'd anxiously peer out after the first few warm days of April, hoping for their promises of Winter's end. Like Brian's Penchant For Purple, however, it didn't take long for these hardy harbingers to multiply and spread, and I soon had more of them than I cared for, too. Thus ends my Fable Of The Violets.

Methinks Brian Williams Was Driving At Something With Tonight's Cravat Selection

Tonight, Brian Williams has tried to placate The Report by returning to a safe haven, a Cravat Of Confidence after last night's Devastating Debacle. He chose the warm claret intarsia sparsely sprinkled with heathery grey dots rimmed in black. After a couple of commercial breaks, I made an immediate connection: to this, and this, and this. Product Placement has hit The Nightly!

I Am Driven To Distraction And To The Depths Of...Well, Just Read!

I'm sorry, but I'm not even going to attempt to describe the pattern or color of this tie because I was far too distracted by the Chasm Of Despair that was its seven inch "dimple," turning it into a bifurcated fabric Highway To Fashion Armageddon. What on earth was that? This cravat canyon was like a snuggly place for a baby kangaroo or a perhaps a stash for a post-Nightly snack burrito or...something. Oh, the agony.

Here's Hoping That The Old Adage Is True: Bad Things Occur In Threes..And Then It's Over

Debut Tie. At least, sort of. This tie is the third of what was obviously a Bulk Buy at Ties-R-Us, as it is the same pattern as the ties of 4-23 and 4-28. This time, the background is maroon and the pinhole circles are ash grey. Doesn't matter. It's a hideous reminder of not only the dreaded Picnic Tie from the Axis of Evil, but also oddly reminiscent of an illustration from my old anatomy text. It showed rafts of white blood cells (lymphocytes? leukocytes?) zooming through a vein (artery?), on their way to combat infection. I'll leave all of you to make the obvious analogy.

A Spring Debut (And Aren't We Glad That Someone Went Shopping?)

Debut Tie. Slender frosty stripes herald Spring in tonight's cravat. The blue of a welcome robin's eggs, the pale yellow of nodding jonquils greeting the season's warm breezes harmonize in this silken symphony.

Brian Is A Fashion Plate

Brian's tie tonight is a real tour de force. It combines a retro color palette with a fashion-forward, couture edge that gets a thumbs-up from The Report. The bold stripes of lilac blush and black are just wide enough to be eyebrow-raising, and its ribbon-like sheen gave it a bit of cinematic presence. Indeed, it made me think immediately of this. (But in a really good, somehow totally masculine way.)

The Report apologizes for its lack of a Report on Monday. Illness made it impossible for a proper viewing both "live" and on the webcast. Thank you for your understanding.

Brian--Never Bound By The Arbitrary Seasonal Dictates Of Fashion--Reprises A Rather Wintry Cravat Ce Soir, And I Feel Wistful

* Brian's tie tonight is a bit warm and wintry for the first day of May. Its garnet field with white pinstriping has an almost holiday look. But I like this tie, even though it reminds me of all kinds of things I was never allowed to have as a child: red and white striped toothpaste (we were a Crest family), bright red frosting on my snowy birthday cakes (too artificial looking, and they would taste bitter), and cinnamon ribbon candy (too spicy; it would burn my tongue and I would waste it). They were right about these things, of course, but it didn't stop me from gazing at them wistfully all the same.

Lakeside

This pleasant stripe of Wedgwood blue and sandstone blush is a welcome respite this evening. I can almost feel the cool, yet slightly humid breeze as it skims the lake. The sky blazes, brassy and cloudless, as a little girl in a summery sundress dips her sand pail at the water's edge again. She draws up a sloshing bucketful and pours it onto the small mound of sand she's been forming up into a sort of castle, built more by her boundless imagination than the tiny hands hard at work under her mother's watchful gaze.

In Which I Am Not Only Keeping Score, But I Am Also Disappointed And Melting...Melting...Melting...

Brian is locked in a Repeat Cycle of Irksome Proportions in so very many ways, dear readers. In less than two weeks, we have seen this salmon and grey striped tie three times now. Add this criminal faux pas to his penchant for Tie Twinning and the redundancy factor becomes Brobdingnagian. My disappointment can best be described in tonight's metaphor: the rivulets from a slowly melting scoop of orange sherbet on the hot cement sidewalk. Sigh.

I Know I Enjoy A Martini Every Now And Then, But Now I'm Seeing Double When I'm Sober

* Debut Tie. I'm reporting live from the CDC, Cravat Duplication Center, where tonight, authorities have made the decision to raise the Alert Level to "Severe" in the wake of Brian Williams' tie selection which is, yet again, a variation of one already in his cravat wardrobe. This evening's tie of whisper-pale lemon yellow surmounted by a pattern of elephant grey circles with pinhole centers is an echo of last Thursday's tie, albeit a far more pleasantly sedate version. Authorities here wish to state for the record that, while this is a rising concern, there is no need for Widespread Fashion Panic. Thus far, they have not seen this malady make the jump from this particular newsman to, say, Keith Olbermann or even Robert Bazell (whose snazzy grey ensemble left The Report feeling a bit wistful).

No Need To Don A Mask, But The Report Is A Bit Under The Weather, And Goes To The Archives For Tonight's Critique

We here at The Report find ourselves a bit under the weather; therefore, we beg your indulgence and ask you to enjoy this Classic Cravat Critique for tonight's tie, which Debuted back on 10 November 2008. Time has not lent it any charm.

The Report is reeling from the Fashion Fiasco that is tonight's tie. Nothing--absolutely nothing--could have prepared The Nightly's viewers for the almost phosphorescent glow of garish orchid. And worse! Those Crayola blue stripes that seemed to run and blur at the right edge of this unholy cravat gave the whole broadcast a weird, Dali-esque vibe, and I kept watching and waiting for the rest of his tie to start melting and running off his shirt and onto the news desk into a puddle of purple and blue.

Esta Corbata También Llega A Ser Pesada Y Es Muy Púrpura.

True, we were overdue for a Purple and a Stripe, but to be frank, this one is starting to bore me with its violet background and wide black bands narrowly bordered with white. Speaking of borders, though, this cravat is starting to remind me of those Mexican serapes that some people like to wear. You know the ones I mean--those heavily woven kind that look itchy and uncomfortable and a little knobbly? Bri's tie is satin, but the stripes...here, see for yourself.

*Title is courtesy www.freetranlsation.com, so don't judge. Spanish is NOT my forte.

Your Tie Has Become Tiresome

It's just that this tie is So Very Shiny. The cornflower blue is okay, and I can even forgive the claustrophobically close pattern of miniature CDs. But, must they be silver? The whole thing makes me want to be rigid and techno, like a bad robo-version of SNL's "Sprockets" in which the host, Dieter, opens his own music store and whenever a customer comes in and asks, "Hey, what's that song you're playing?" Dieter rushes to the CD player, grabs the disc out of it, and in a fit of pique nails it to the wall. He then turns to the hapless questioner and says, "Your terror is gorgeous. Now we dance!"

A Cravatical Voyage To The Bottom Of The Sea

It's Earth Day, and Brian Williams celebrates with a dark marine blue tie with narrow pearl white stripes, widely staggered. This cravat is like peering into the depths of the sea, down, down, still farther down until all that can inhabit its cold stillness are thready-tentacled creatures whose flagellae are a light-starved white, as if they subsist on the silent darkness itself.

A Guest Reporter Of Sorts From The Annals Of American History Weighs In On This Most Egregious (And Odious) Of Repeat Cycles

Brian Williams would do well to remember the words of American statesman Benjamin Franklin who said, "Fish and visitors smell in three days." Tonight, Mr. Williams, television news anchor and sometime fashion disappointment, again wore his once-new and now sadly tedious and played-out salmon and grey striped cravat, just worn on Friday, April 17. How incredibly apt the fish/salmon metaphor seems now within the context of the Franklin aphorism! Would that wisdom were catching....

One Order Of Frog Sticks, And Hemorrhage 'Em In The Alley For Tonight's Report

This cravat has been called into heavy rotation in less than a month. Its stripes of silver grey and leather red lend it a Vintage Air. This necktie made me want to stop at a diner, maybe take a spin on one of those red and chrome stools, and get a big plate of handcut fries with a load of ketchup. (If you're having a cheeseburger, I'll take a bite of yours. Make sure it's medium rare, extra pickles.)

Having A Wonderful Time. Wish You Were Here

Brian knots up, for the second time only, this salmon pink and grey striped cravat. Aside from the fish itself, that color is also evocative of those technicolor postcards from Florida, luring Snowbirds like me with their vision of a cinematic sunset of impossible hues.

Brian Cannot Seem To Put Together A Decent Run Of Good Ties, And I Have Become A Bit Snippy (And Retro)

Oh my. Was it really, fundamentally, a midnight blue and white checked tie? Really? As I watched, all I could think of was fresh-faced forties pin-up girls wearing checkered halter tops or those checkered halter one-piece short outfits--showing off their gams--posed in front of carefully placed hay bales or leaning sort of provocatively against a piece of barn siding. They were supposed to look wholesomely sexy, you know, like the girl next-door, and the checkery pattern was all part of the ploy. So, Brian Williams, just what are you selling us behind that innocent-looking cravat?

This Cravat Is Tres Bien To The Last Drop

It was only a week ago that Brian debuted this cravat, but after last night's Tie Travesty, we here at The Report are willing to overlook this rapid repeat. After all, a second viewing of this lovely blend of rich almond cream and dark espresso stripes is most welcome. It's very like that fragrant cup of French Roast at the end of a satisfying meal, dark until you pour the luxurious cream, watching as its clouds mix and blend in a small tempest of contentment.

Not So Much A Cravat As A Faux Pas

Ouch. There's a reason that Crayola retired this color back in 2000. Would that BriWi had done the same with this tie, the thistle solid silk. Not many other hues screech "cheap and tacky" so immediately as this. There's just something so very Spray Cheese And Beer Wedding Reception about it; it's a color that hollers, "Looky here, these ones are two for one and they're only a little dented!" It's a color that we all try not to make eye contact with, but murmur our pleasantries to the host, and then at the first decent and gracious opportunity, flee as if our social lives depended on it.

This Blue Cravat Is As Pretty As A Picture

What a lovely tie! This stripe was a symphony of creamy pale sky and cadet blue with a perfectly executed four-in-hand and impeccably shaped and centred dimple. Silk coloured like this would usually be found on fanciful waistcoats worn by cunning little mice, or twirled as frilly parasols by aristocratic bunnies in those gorgeously inked illustrations of keepsake storybooks like The Wind in the Willows or anything done by Beatrix Potter.

Brian Debuts A Somewhat Contrasting Cravat, Complete With Baby Farm Animals And A Road Trip (Now You Just Have To Read!)

Debut Tie. Back in the 80s when the Economy had taken a downturn before, Rick and I used to take long drives and stop at odd places for entertainment. One such place was a Landmark Feed Store, where every once in a while there would be cage-pens full of tiny chicks and waddling, beeping baby ducks. Tonight, Brian's tie reminded me of that experience with its metal grey and soft yellow stripes.

The Report Decides It's Time For An Intervention Of Sorts; After All, We All Want To Be Sure

"Well, it's nothing specific, Dr. Kelly, it's just that I can't seem to trust my eyes anymore....I mean, take, for instance, Brian Williams's ties lately. Every single one he wears looks navy blue! Tonight's tie had to be--if it was what I think I saw, anyway--the single most boring tie in the History Of Ties. Dark navy blue. Narrow white stripes at wide intervals. I mean, my God! He was even wearing it with a navy blue suit! It's like he's not even trying ANY MORE! HE'S--WHAT! What? Oh. Um...A...F...erm...I think...Q..."

Just The Facts, Ma'am

It's Back To Basics at The Nightly for Brian Williams tonight as he knots up the solid violet tie. Nothing fancy here: tight four-in-hand? dimple to knot ratio? matte silk? requisite purpleness? Check, check, check, and...check.

Une Cravate Du La Pâtisserie Ou La Confiserie

Debut Tie. A tough call to make at The Report this evening, even with the tight shots from the so-obliging Nightly cameraperson. I'm characterizing this cravat as a stripe of deepest chestnut and mellow cream. It was absolutely delicious looking, like a dark chocolate-covered French nougat bitten in half revealing its creamy centre, or lovely eclairs de chocolat, layered in sweet and gooey goodness. (The rest of l'ensemble left much to be desired, but la cravate était somptueuse!)

I Am Pushed To The Limit, And I Want My Freedom

Pushing the limits of The Report's good humour, Mr. Williams repeats the cravat of 27 March, the stripe of silver and sanguinary red. Irked as I am by not only this rapid repetition, but also by a blast of arctic weather and a late spring break, not to mention a few glimpses of Braveheart as I channel-surfed this weekend, and I'm feeling a bit violent. This evening's cravat is starting to look an awful lot like an upraised battle sword, fresh from the bowels of its adversary, hilts streaming blood as the wielder makes ready to run through yet another offender. (Probably someone who used the wrong form of "there" or made a noun plural with an apostrophe or, heaven help us, said "irregardless." Quelle horreur!)

Somewhere Over The Thames, BW's Cravat Could Actually Be Seen

*Debut Tie. Fie, Brian Williams! Must you debut a tie when I am held hostage by Parent Conferences and can only view it on my computer screen? And must you obscure said Debut Tie with an overcoat and poorly-lit outdoor set? All I could manage to discern was: black, possible white checkerboardish pattern, or maybe flattish disks in checkerboardish array alternating white and grey. This is highly unsatisfactory. This cravat has potential as a Strong Performer, despite the fact that it made me think of old black and white footage of Judy Garland, dressed in a black sequined dress, singing boozy ballads.

BWI To CLE Cravat

Brian ushers in a new month wearing his deep indigo tie with tiny white dots in martial array. This cravat is like being in the window seat on the late night flight. As your plane banks into the final turn to make its descent, you take a look outside and see row upon row of starlike lights illuminating the airport parking lot. In the dark, just for a moment, it is as if you may never reach the ground.

My Sacrifice Goes Unrewarded Yet Again, But As A Professional Public Educator And BW Cravat Enthusiast, I Am Used To It

*March goes out like a...Typical Brian Williams Tie, really. There is no metaphor here, Report Readers, because it's another Striper, and it's complicated by the fact that I had to view it on the computer screen, being held Hostage By Parent Conferences as I was during the Nightly broadcast. I am unable, therefore, to completely discern whether the stripes betwixt the soft gold were jet or deepest navy (The Williams Standby Colour). In any case, the knot was lovely, the tie was très sophistiqué, but was that shirt really pale blue encore?

Je n'espère pas....

This Tie Just Isn't Doing It For Me, I'm Afraid

Tonight, Brian Williams dons a very pleasant, very unremarkable tie of sky blue silk with narrow stripes--widely spaced--of navy. Oh, it's pleasant and breezy and springlike, to be sure. It's the kind of tie that Grandma would say, "Oh, now there's a nice tie to wear with your blue suit for Easter service!", or a tired wife might grab on her way out of Macy's and think, "This tie will be fine with that blue sportcoat and pale blue shirt for Angela's wedding." It's not edgy or avant garde, but it won't be a punch line at Christopher's bar mitzvah, either.

A Vintage Series Cravat Returns, And So Do I, To Bygone Days Via Corner Store Confections

When I was a little kid, I used to walk three blocks to Czuba's corner market, plunk down my nickel and buy penny candy. I'd choose from Smarties, Nik-l-Nips, wax lips, those long strips of paper with candy dots on them, jawbreakers, Pixi Stix, and a bunch of other cheap delights. Brian's tie tonight--a Vintage Series favorite too long absent--reminded me of those long ago days, with its stripes of coin silver and licorice whip red.

Brian Says It With A Solid Matte Silk

Ah, Spring! You have arrived, and readers of The Report can be certain of it, for Brian's tie is your Harbinger. This cravat is like looking at a bouquet of the season's signature blossoms--fragrant starlike hyacinths, stately crowned irises, and the frosty stripe of the precocious crocuses all share this lovely shade of lavender blue.

In Which The Report Takes A Rather Sudden Yet Meaningful Jaunt Down Memory Lane, But It's All Relevant, So Stay With Me

About 30 years ago, my mother inexplicably began gathering dried things like milkweed pods and cattails and sprigs of money tree and eucalyptus and then, after arranging them somewhat artfully, spraypainted the whole thing silver or gold and set it on the coffee table or gave it to friends as a gift. All of which is to say that tonight, Brian Williams' tie is sort of like an arrangement of Cheerios--spraypainted silver--all carefully lined up in rows upon a cornflower blue something or other. And what was with that knot?

(My mother's Spraypainted Dried Things Period was mercifully short, by the way.)

Because The News Is Nothing To Joke About

Tonight Brian knots up a very statesmanlike cravat from the Conservative Collection at The Nightly. Its deep suitcoat navy field is crossed with ruby stripes bordered with still narrower stripes of pearly white. It is a staid tie, a serious tie, a sort of harrumphing bit of neckwear fashion, much like a senior butler who would lift one eyebrow--very subtly yet meaningfully--at the Young Master who might reach for his water goblet before the Mister of the Manor had completed the toast.

He's Back...And So Is A Dose Of The Usual

After a hiatus in this Month of New Ties, Brian Williams has returned wearing a plethora of Neckwear Hallmarks familiar to Nightly viewers: stripes, navy blue, yellow, tight four-in-hand, and generous cut. This cravat, however, is one that The Report has taken a while to bestow approval upon. Its stripes are voluptuously wide, its navy deep to the point of being almost-black, and its yellow the color of whipped butter cake batter. It's a bold fashion statement that is curiously formal looking, yet oddly evocative of this.

The Wearin' O' The Green Is Wearin' Out Me Apostrophe Allotment (But A Wee Rest From Purple Is Worth It, Sure!)

In a reprise of last year's stunning St. Patrick's Debut, Brian Williams once again dons his First Ever Green Tie, the stripe of forest green and true blue matte silk. Almost as stunning, it evokes not only the memory of the cover of my old elementary school science book, which showed Earth from space circa 1969, but also this Google Earth image. Ah! Le temps marche en avant!

Let Me Eat Cake. Please!

Debut Tie. After a long weekend Brian knots up yet another new cravat! This one is an oxblood Ivy Leaguer with widely spaced, narrow stripes of pearlescent white shot through with a thread of the darker color. All I could think about as I carefully analyzed that tie was a slice of dark chocolate red velvet cake with glossy whipped white frosting, and pretty soon I was settling for graham crackers and this. Not the same; not even close.

Aside From The Health Benefits, Embracing A New Colour Palette Can Be Exciting

Debut Tie. In a departure from his Usual Palette, Brian knots up a fashionable cravat of grey and muted coral stripes, certainly the Style Twin of Monday's offering. This tie immediately brings to mind a perfectly broiled salmon fillet, skin still on, flesh temptingly colorful.

Plant Tongue Firmly In Cheek; Read In Best BW Voice

"Tonight we debut a new series here on NBC Nightly News called Recession Is the Mother of Invention and we kick it off with a visit to Netarts, Oregon, and Farkas Tait, who owns a small dry cleaner shop on Main Street in this village of less than 1000 residents. Farkas, in addition to the usual cleaning, does tailoring and mending, and this recession has been more boom than bust for him. Because you see, Farkas can not only alter a man's suitcoat, but use the leftover scraps to make a matching tie! I sent along this jacket I'm wearing tonight--one that I used to wear around the newsroom back in the eighties--and not only did Farkas remake this indigo broadcloth into a stylish coat I'm proud to wear in the new millennium, but he also made this tie as well. As you can see, there are no visible seams anyplace, and it matches perfectly. Well done, Farkas Tait, and look out Jos. A. Bank!"

A Grim Fairy Tale

Once upon a time in a land far away, there was a Sad Ugly Tie of ultramarine blue with narrow sky blue stripes and still narrower pale blue stripes of a yet another shade even more incompatible with the ultramarine blue. "Oh, crap," SUT sighed. "I am so hideously unsightly that no one, not ever, will want to wear me around his neck. My shades of blue do not match even each other, let alone a suit of any decent level of taste or style. I will probably end up in a Dollar Store or on the neck of some inbred at a Halloween party catered by Bud Light and Pork Rinds R Us." Just then, America's Most Trusted Voice In News reached for him, and he lived happily ever after. The End.

Writing The Report Was Far Easier Than Trying To Come Up With A Good Title...Forgive Me; I've Been Ill

Debut Tie. Brian has definitely chosen grey and blue as his Alternate Signature Palette this season. This cravat pairs a heathery grey with a soft sky blue in the familiar striped template. There's something very comforting and cuddly about this cravat, like wearing your boyfriend's big sweatshirt over your flannel pj pants, or grabbing your grandpa's old jacket out of the summer cottage closet and tossing it on over your shorts to sit out on a cool, starry night to roast marshmallows on the hibachi.

Classically Conservative/Award Winning (Depending Upon Your Frame Of Reference; I Think There's A Pun There)

* Brian channels his Ward Cleaver/Mr. Rogers personae and dons a Very Conservative Tie this evening. Very stripey, very narrow, and very traditional as far as I can tell this morning via my monitor and the not-so-sharp webcast, I have to confess. But as far as I can tell, it is a somber mix of wide burgundy stripes crossed by twin diagonals of white bordered by the classic deep navy. Partnered as it was with crisp white shirt and navy jacket, Bri looked like he was fresh from the set of Mad Men or Revolutionary Road.

Sometimes, Bad Things Happen To Good Ties

Normally The Report favors this Purple Cravat, a matte silk of deep lilac with an almost frosty hue. With one glimpse, we can be transported to the bountiful lavender fields of Provence and see not only the gorgeous blossoms themselves, but the silvery fronds of the herb's fragrant foliage as picturesquely scarved or bonneted women gather it in wide wicker baskets. Tonight, however, the image is marred somewhat by a devastatingly off-centre dimple deep enough to be a crater left by a tragic tractor mishap. Alors!

The Report And Its French Are Conquered By The Purple Army

The Respite From Purple And Stripes is over, dear ones. Quel dommage, c'est vrai. For tonight, Brian knots up his cravat of creamy violet matte silk with burnished gold stripes. Was the knot centred and finely controlled? Mais oui! Was the fabric acceptably rich? Absolument! Was it reminiscent of luxurious...oh merde! Je suis fatiguee et sans inspiration! The Purples And Stripes are victorious. Bon soir.

Wherein I Predict The Ravages Of A Repeat Cycle, Should It Perpetuate

Since its successful debut on 3 February, Brian has put this tie into a heavy rotation, wearing it again on 18 February, and again tonight. If he's not cautious, we will become aweary of its somber charcoal bands crossed by whispery blue satin. Instead of positive associations with antebellum beauties and sexy librarians, we'll be thinking instead of a blue-eyed "heroin chic" model's kohl-smudged stare.

In Which Everything Old Is New Again, Or, Perhaps, The Other Way Around

The Picnic Tie goes a bit upscale tonight in this storm blue and pale slate version of its Axis of Evil cousin. From a long shot, this cravat looks a bit like placid gingham, but thanks to the ever-so obliging Nightly cameraperson, I practically OD'd on tight closeups and discovered that the pattern was instead row upon row of--what to call them? a neologism is required here, I think--*obloids. Up close, they were reminiscent of that scene in old movies when a character, at night, is standing in front of the bluish glow of a mass of Philco television screens in the old appliance store window watching some momentous news event. There they were, obloid, bluish, and arrayed in front of me, and I had to watch...I just had to.

*obloid--(adj. or n.) 1. oblong, but with rounded edges. 2. a shape with these characteristics.

Hey, Rick Santelli! I've Got A New Tie Pour Vous!

Debut Tie. Brian Williams knots up a deep violet blue dotted Swiss cravat this evening, one that is notably sans dimple. It's a classic Casual Friday Tie, with its tres petite spots tightly and perfectly spaced, yet lending an air of breezy efficiency and snazzy informality. It's kind of like a young intern who wears Birkenstocks and an eyebrow piercing but can nail anyone on asset allocations and strike prices.

Ah, The Cruel "Cravat After" The Night Before...!

Brian reverts back to blah and boring Purple status with this solid silk tonight. The color is vivid enough--a saturated magenta--but I find myself uninspired. Worn with the Suspect Pajama Shirt, this tie was simply meh. Kind of like Muzak and meatloaf: certainly not enough to rant and rage about, but not worthy of kudos very often, either.

Bon Soir, And May I Have This Dance?

Narrow icy pink stripes with a nuance of lilac cross a midnight blue field in tonight's dramatic and lovely cravat. I think of an elegant soiree, with tuxedoed men twirling gowned women wearing satin and silk. A few couples, heady with champagne and romance, sashay out onto the terrace to gaze at the stars in the night sky while enjoying the scent of gorgeous pink climbing roses on the balcony rail.

Best Animated Short, Cravat Category

Reporting from Washington D.C., Brian dons a cravat not seen in quite some time. The Report has missed this Crayola blue tie with petite charcoal grey kite shapes sparsely scattered upon its jacquard woven field. The overall effect is like a quiet and intense scene of French animation, perhaps of a child's funeral tribute to her dead grandpere: against a brilliant blue sky, petite Sophie releases a somber grey kite and, one by one, all the guests release a grey kite and all the kites slowly rise to the heavens in memory of Grandpere, the best kite-maker in the whole village. Fin.

Oh, I Say, Brian Is Barmy For The Purples Tonight!

For tonight's Forecast of Doom, dear Brian knots up both a Purple and a Stripe, this one a rich plum colour with widely staggered diagonals of ebony bordered by pristine pearl. It's all veddy, veddy British, this noble cravat, with its plumminess and jewelled tones, isn't it? It puts me in the mind of a terribly, terribly ornate yet masculine teacup one would buy for a quite wealthy and titled bachelor, a Lord Earlsworth-on-Haighsbury or something like that, who would observe the custom but not want something awfully girlish and all, what what?

A Day Late, A Bit Of A Grudge, And A Dinner Date All Add Up To A Backward Glance By The Report

* Even though Brian has not worn this cravat in quite a while, I have not yet forgiven him for its overuse last summer. I almost created a new category just for it, The Den of Ubiquity, relegating both this cravat and a few other overworn ties that I was weary of viewing to this Necktie Limbo of sorts. Since I am still holding a grudge (and since I missed a "live" viewing of the tie due to a dinner out), I beg your indulgence and offer up this Classic Cravat Critique from 31 October 2007:

Tonight, Brian wore a cravat of light indigo peppered with deep blue polka dots. It reminded me of the days when I used to hang my vintage Levis on the clothesline in my mom's backyard so they could fade naturally to the classic vintage blue. Some summer days, the heat would build enough that a passing shower would erupt, and I would run out and grab the jeans off the line as the raindrops darkened the denim here and there with spots of the freshwater that fell from the glowering clouds.

The Report Is A Bit Distracted, But It Animates This Tie With Ample Vocabulary, Plus A Condiment And A Notion

Brian has a few of these Country Calico-inspired cravats, and this one is by far the most florid. Its tomato red is sprigged with odd wing-shaped ivory bits, alternating small and large, almost looking as if they were little steam vents allowing the molten red to breathe so that it doesn't all explode in one bubbling, ketchuppy eructation.

Either that, or it looks like Grandma's pincushion.

The Return of The Tie, And With It, A Few Titillating Tableaux

Ah, La Cravate de Distinction! C'est magnifique! What a treat to see its bands of textured business-suit grey and satin baby blue. This tie is like catching a glimpse of a sexy slip under the staid librarian's sensible skirt, or seeing the hint of a Victoria's Secret cami peeking from the neckline of the middle-aged choir director's jacket at your church. The paradox is startling, but mysteriously alluring.

A Study In Deep Purple

Deep violet raw silk is the cravat offering ce soir, and it will always get a nod of approval from Le Report. A purple this deep, this elegant is the muted basso of the cello in the capable hands of Yo-Yo Ma, the mellow scent of a wine cellar in October, the whispery hush of a velvet cape across the boards of the Globe.

Hey! Let's All Go With The Nightly Show!

Wow. This tie just keeps showing up and for the life of me, I cannot figure out why. Electric purple with iridescent, peacock blue (wait, no, they're mint green, no, now they're--just never mind) checks doesn't seem to be Bri's thing. Instead, this fabric is better suited to those sleeveless shifts worn by mod dancers doing the watusi and the monkey on shows like Upbeat . Perhaps all this tie needs to be understood is a pair of white go-go boots and some eyeliner.

Tonight's Cravat Inspires A Collegiate Tableau

Brian Williams goes strictly Ivy League tonight with this striped tie. Its scarlet field crossed by bold navy stripes bordered narrowly with white is a truly classic cravat. The color palette brings to mind letterman sweaters and varsity jackets on broad-shouldered, crewcut-topped young men strolling the Quad and lounging at tables in the Union, drinking Cokes out of big bulb glasses. Now and then, a girl wearing her hair in a flip or a pageboy would stop to flirt, then be on her way to class.

A Celestial Cravat

Midnight blue with pearlescent white stripes so thin that they could be called pinstripes is the offering this evening from Mr. Williams. What a celestial cravat! This tie reminds me of an astronomy filmstrip I viewed in elementary school when my teacher, the very cool and progressive Mrs. Edwards, bid us all lie on our backs as she showed it on the ceiling. The constellations were shown first on a dark blue night sky, then in the next frame, shiny white lines connected them, showing Orion's belt, Cassiopeia's chair, the Big and Little Dipper. Perhaps I will buy one of those star-naming kits and claim a piece of the sky for Bri's Ties.

This Tie Brings Out The House Beautiful Wannabe In Me

It is The Month Of Reprise here in February as Brian Williams knots up a cravat he just wore on Groundhog Day. (I shall spare you the ironic cinematic reference.) The smoky iced blue planted with rosy little posies is a lovely fabric for a skirted dressing-table and a matching bench with a tufted cushion. If the young lady's room were big enough, perhaps even a matching dust-ruffle or canopy for the bed would be nice, but in a small room, it would just be too much.

Je Suis Feeling Très Français And Magnanimous At Le Report Ce Soir

Oh, Brian. J'adore ce petit jeu que nous jouons. So very "cat and mouse" it is. I chide you a bit for your ostentatious cravat after une Debut tour de force, and within four days, you puckishly put it on again in all its glowing purplishness and narrow white striped glory. Are you trying to bait me into a Rant About Repeat Cycles, dearest? Que vous êtes bête ! I shall let this one pass and blame it on your preoccupation with The Stimulus Package, High-Speed Rail Development, and Infrastructure Repair. Le kiss.

In Which There Is A Sixties Sitcom, A Streetwalker, And Probably The Need For An Intervention

You know how in the sitcom Bewitched, Samantha had Serena, her alter ego cousin who was the brunette version of her with more makeup and a sluttier, edgier attitude? Well, tonight, Brian's cravat--of dark Crayola blue with goldenrod stripe--made from an odd fabric with a vinyl-esque finish is sort of the Serena to the TWSNLBRAINDTM *. It's the Black Sheep Cravat--the one that ran away and Went Bad: you know, started wearing blue pleather hotpants and an ugly yellow halter top out there on the mean streets, showing its dimple for anyone with a little cash. Sad, really. Fashion gone wrong.

*for an explanation of this acronym, please see sidebar

A Cravatical Conundrum

Here at The Report, we find ourselves in a quandary. Tonight's tie, lacking a tight closeup by the unusually stingy cameraperson at The Nightly, appears to be thistle overlaid by a magenta mesh pattern, a mistake almost made back on 14 January, the last time BW wore this selfsame cravat. Then, only a shockingly intimate lensing revealed it to be, in truth, sky blue with red. Do I report The Tie That I See, or The Tie That I Know It To Be? Ah, the vicissitudes of sartorial reporting!

It's Like When You Try To Listen To Someone Who Has Spinach In His Teeth...

The Report is in denial with regard to le chemise de pyjama mystérieuse a la les stripes lately, which may or may not be two separate shirts. Either way, said shirt did not provide a suitable backdrop for this evening's tie. Being so distracted, I beg your indulgence as I pull forth this
Classic Cravat Critique from 10-27-08: If it's not striped, it's purple, and this one was the saturated raw silk solid red-violet one from Brian's Panoply O' Purples. It's very textured and deeply colored, so I can't get too annoyed with it. When I see it, I start thinking of melty grape popsicles that are just ready to fall off the stick and onto the hot sidewalk below, only because you've been wise enough to eat those last few bites bent waaay over, knowing that you're in a race against The Laws Of Physics themselves.

Oh, Brian, How Could You? Or, I Invoke A Revolutionary And Big Pharma To Get Me Through It All

Alas! As Thomas Paine once said, it is only a step from the sublime to the ridiculous, and Brian Williams took that step tonight. After le triomphe that was last night's cravat, tonight's is certainly a misstep. Its vivid purple with jarringly white narrow stripes made me sigh repeatedly. All I could think of was how it could easily be the subtle uniform tie of a pharmaceutical salesman shilling for Advair, Nexium, Prilosec, or even Dimetapp...oh, any of the various purply medicines currently on the market. I could just imagine it being kept in place with a tietac made to look like an itsy-bitsy inhaler or a rather enlarged capsule, you know, just for fun. But not on America's number one newsman.

A Brief Historical And Musical Interlude Provided By The Report And Inspired By This Debut Tie

Debut Tie. Brian knots up yet another new tie this evening, stripes of baby blanket blue satin and textured flint grey. The contrast is at once startling and intriguing, like a carriage of Civil War belles, arrayed in ball gowns and tippets, but tucked in snugly under warm woolen blankets to fend off an unseasonable autumn chill. Their suitors can see but a glimpse of the hems of their colorful dresses before they cast off their coverings and, taking the hands of their gentlemen, reveal the bright plumage beneath.

(For those of you who want a little background music while you read this Report, click here and press "Play.")

In Which There Is A Debut Tie, And The Report Shows Its Age. Sigh.

Debut Tie. To begin the month, Brian surprises us with une cravate nouvelle. Belying the groundhog's dire prediction, this tie seems rather the harbinger of Spring, with its dusky sapphire field besprinkled with row upon row of rosy little circlet flowers. It's rather like a preteen girl's stationery, the kind with matching envelopes lined with a coordinated color in a lovely little box that even comes with a scented pen that invariably smells like raspberries or strawberries, and little stickers used to seal the envelopes. (But now I'm dating myself. Preteen girls don't use stationery anymore; they just engage in "sexting" on their cellphones, don't they? Sigh. They're missing out on the stickers....)

Looking Like An Officer And A Gentleman, Brian Williams Returns To A Wardrobe Standby

Brian brings back one of his standby ties, the wide stripe of military navy and wan gold. Very dressy and polished, this tie brings to mind such medals as The Navy Cross, the US Navy Medal of Honor , and the US Army Medal of Honor. With its tight, four-in-hand knot and classic deep dimple, The Report salutes this cravat!

The Report Fantasizes About The Origins Of The Whole Purple Thing

Tonight, Brian has occasion to wear what I like to think is The Starter Tie, the one cravat that was his foray into satisfying his Purple Fetish, the violet matte silk solid. It's obviously of good quality, the color is deep, saturated, and evocative of royalty rather than femininity, and it is always strongly dimpled. One can almost imagine BW standing at the display of ties, squaring his shoulders, and saying under his breath, "I'm just going to get it. I like purple, no big deal. If anyone says anything, I'll just ignore them." And he's been doing it ever since.

The Repetition Of A Once-Favourite Tie Provokes A Lunchbox Analogy

Brian Williams has put this cravat into an especially Heavy Rotation lately. This tie of cinnamon-spiked wine with a sprinkle of ecru polka dots barely outlined in black was just seen on 13 January after twice appearing in December as well. If Bri isn't careful, I'm going to get mighty tired of this tie. It's like when you told your mom you liked Little Debbie Oatmeal Creme Pies in your lunch and then she started putting them in there all the time. Now you cannot stand the sight of that red-haired, freckle-faced snot in the broad-brimmed hat, let alone those damned snack cakes.

A Winter Storm Calls For A Classic Cravat Critique

While Mr. Williams is having a Blue Period, The Report is singin' the blues. As much as a foot of snow is forecast, and added to what's already on the ground, we may wake to over twenty inches of the white stuff.
Longing for warmer days, The Tie Report hearkens back to 16 July 2007 for this Classic Cravat Critique: Brian returns to a tried and true stripe, this one reminiscent of a summery breakfast of blueberries mounded invitingly in a moat of ice-cold milk. The color combination is crisp and clean, and this cravat gives its wearer a look of cool polish and finesse.

In Which We Are Restrained In Our Dismay And Outrage, Following The Example Of Our New President, At This Unprecedented Repeat Cycle

In an Unforgiveable Repeat Cycle, BW--obviously aglow from the favorable review of Thursday's (1-22) Report--decided to bask in its radiance once again. Well, that's just not what we do here, Mr. Williams. Certainly donning the selfsame midnight blue textured solid cravat twice in three on-air days is not change we can believe in. Can you do better? Yes you can!

Assessment/Evaluation Of The Cravat Seems Called For By The Cravat Itself

*A familiar standby appears tonight, as Brian Williams tightens the knot of the cranberry cravat with the pattern of sky blue eerily reminiscent of those brainstorm cluster maps that I used to teach my students to organize their thoughts in the Pre-Writing Stage. All those circles and sticks make me feel a little like I have papers to grade lurking somewhere. But this tie--a B- .

A Very Serious Tie Leads The Report Into A Rather Bronte-esque Reverie (Or Is It Dickensian?)

Back in NYC, Brian Williams is a Rhapsody in Blue this evening, culminating in a midnight blue cravat of textured fabric with the usual tight four-in-hand avec une deep dimple. It's a Very Serious Tie, this solid--conservative, tactful, and judicious, much like the elder relatives in Victorian novels whose duty it is to tell young persons the Terrible News that they are now Orphans. "You are to be the Man Of The House Now," they say to the young, tearful boy at their knee. "It is dreadful, but there's no help for it. And I shall do all I can for you." Of course, in the next chapter, that well-meaning relative dies of consumption, but at the time, the sentiment was most encouraging.

There's A Lot Going On In Washington, And Not All Of It Is Fashionable

Debut Tie. Still in our nation's capital, Brian Williams dons another questionable cravat. This one looks to be a minute houndstooth pattern in mulberry and turquoise. It's another one of those flickery, changeable ties that make life rough here at The Report. A cousin of the hideous purple houndstooth, this tie is not only an ill-advised color combination on its own--and much too tightly-knotted, too--but with the pale blue striped shirt and jet black jacket, the color palette is jarring. It's like allowing the 4-year old child you're babysitting to play dress-up, and she waltzes out wearing a cowboy hat, tutu, Batman cape, and majorette boots. Parts of it might work at a funky New York rave, but "right time, right place" is still a good caveat.

In Which The Report Celebrates Not Only Our New President, But A Wholly Appropriate Neckwear Choice As Well

Live from The Inauguration of Barack Obama, 44th President of the United States, Mr. Williams is dapper and smart in his navy cravat with narrow white stripes. This tie has the snap of a crisp white glove against dress blues as it executes a perfect salute past the Reviewing Stand. Its look is polished, precise, and perfect in protocol. Hail to the Cravat!

Quelle Horreur! C'est "L'Axis D'Evil!"

Live from Washington, D.C., Brian Williams knots up The Picnic Tie (with, of all the horrors, a navy pinstripe jacket!) from The Axis of Evil.

Who Says I Can't Mention George Clooney And The Lincoln Memorial In The Same Report? And Act Like I Can't Stick A Few Pop Culture References In There!

Debut Tie. Mr. Williams hears Our Plea and wraps up the week with a very sedate and conservative cravat. Tonight's tie is obsidian with widely staggered white stripes cut with slim bands of graphite grey. I'm not even going to rail against the uninspired coloration or pattern of this cravat, so relieved I am with the fact that it's not purple or shimmying across my television screen like a belly dancer hepped up on Red Bull and a Netflix marathon of George Clooney movies. Instead, it is present much like The Lincoln Memorial: staid, conveying a sense of gravitas, and dignified.

In Which We Implore It To Stop--The Madness, The Madness, Please Stop The Madness

Debut Tie. * Make it stop. Someone, please.

Clearly, someone purchased Brian Williams a gift for Christmas at a specialty store called something like "Baskets O' Ties." This person chose the Red-Blue-Purple Collection, for Brian's Debut Ties thus far all seem to be in some sort of odd kinship, sharing hues and characteristics--none of them all that desirable--that suggest they were purchased either by the same person, at the same shop, at the same time, or for the sole reason of annoying The Report. In any case, tonight's particular cravat was a puzzling number of deep raspberry overlaid by an oddly luminescent peacock checkerboard that seemed to be made of cellophane. The whole thing reminded me of a mermaid costume for a Barbie doll--sort of a sequin/paillette tube-esque affair that gave me a distinct Phyllis Diller hat flashback. So...not good. Not good at all.

A Debut Tie Proves Worrisome For The Report, And Sometimes We Just Need A Little Distance And Top Chef

Debut Tie. A Worrisome Cravat for The Report. Upon first viewing, it looked like a thistle-colored tie with a magenta mesh overlay, yet, when the Nightly cameraperson came in for Extreme Closeup, the true coloration was revealed: it was a red and robin's egg blue diagonal checkerboard pattern! Truly, I began to question my visual acuity, already somewhat compromised by both a headache and the heady prospect of a Snow Day, already called by my School District for Thursday. Faced with this dilemma, I did what any other Respectable Cravat Critic would do: I retired to my bed and the new episode of Top Chef and left things for the morning.

I will trust Report Readers to weigh in with their Tie Experiences and provide reinforcement.

Perhaps Overstaying Its Welcome, But Welcome Nonetheless

This cravat shows Dots Done Right, unlike the fashion faux pas of Friday. True, BW has leaned heavily upon this tie, putting it into a Strenuous Rotation, but its warm crimson field and neutral dove-colored circlets (oh so sparsely scattered, modestly rimmed with black) are always a tasteful and welcome sight. It is not unlike finding that favorite Aunt at a family gathering: true, she does not tell the world's most interesting stories, but she does not grab your cheeks, nor does she interrogate you unmercifully about your personal life, either. She is content to hug you, seems genuinely pleased to see you, and always brings her famous fudge brownies.

Gratitude For A Purple? How Far We Have Fallen, And In Such A Short Time

The Report can draw breath again, now that Brian Williams has had a return to Sanity in the form of this evening's solid cravat. Its welcome hue of deep violet and fabric of matte silk almost overcome its small faults of a too-tight knot and slightly askew dimple. This tie is the plush interior of a jeweller's ring box, the soft, velvety face of an African violet, and the understated drama of a lady's opera cape. Bravo.

In Which The Tie Provokes References Not Just To Soda, But To Drag Queens, A Director, And A Diva

Debut Tie. In a startling sartorial turnabout of taste, Brian Williams missteps and stumbles so badly that he totters on the edge of Fashion Armageddon. This ... tie, for lack of a better word--is it Jeremy Scott's homage to Cherry 7Up? Is it a repurposing project from Parson's School of Design made from a remnant from a drag queen's costume for a revue called La Femmasaurus Rex? For I can think of no other reasons pour cette existence de la cravate, the nightmare that it is of frosted rose satin with woven bubble/pebble design, making it look like cheap pink champagne--no, a tacky stuffed dinosaur from a carnival midway game--no, a 1970s lounge singer's polyester gown with matching capelet worn by Beyonce in some Scorcese film that's just way too long--no, oh never mind. It was horrid.

Stripe Week Continues, And The Report Must Perhaps Resort To The Urban Dictionary In Future

Brian continues Stripe Week with this standby, the pale indigo and black tie. It reminds me of rocker guys' fading Levis worn with concert tees, or emo boys' skinny jeans paired with their black thermal shirts: sort of edgy and dark and cool. (Yet, when a dimple is this perfectly placed, just how "rad" can one be?)

The First Appearance Of A Fashion Twin--And I Have A Joni Mitchell Moment

In another eerie reprise, Brian wears a tie that he wore almost exactly one month ago today. It is one of his Fashion Twins--this one the color of deepening twilight's purpled clouds, slightly softened in its hue. It is crossed at wide intervals by jet-black stripes bordered in white, like the contrails of skyward planes as they breach the darkening sky.

A Cravat-Inspired Medieval Reverie

It has been a month since we've seen this tie, a standby in the Williams Wardrobe. Its stripes of true navy blue and mellowed gold hearken back to the livery of castle footmen and pages wearing the colors of their lords as they hasten to fulfill the whims of nobility. Cushions are placed under slippered feet, wines are poured into pewter goblets, horses are tethered to iron rings. A clap of hands and lutes begin to play in the great hall as the feast begins.

And We Begin Anew With Classic Stripes

Back from his holiday hiatus, Brian Williams sets the Fashion Tone for 2009 with one from his Vintage Series. This tie, deep navy with widely-spaced stripes of rich crimson bordered by stripes so brilliantly white that they look like liquid silver, is a classic. It has the timelessness of a trench coat, the snap and polish of military dress blues, and the authority of a leather brief case. Well done.

The Report's Hiatus Continues

The Report finds itself not only sans cravate, but entirely sans Monsieur Williams aussi. As Le Star, Brian can take as much time as he wishes over The Holidays. Naturally, we hope not only for a speedy return to The Nightly, but that Santa--a frequent reader of The Report--had a few stylish surprises in his bag for Brian.

Brian Williams Makes A Tie Turnaround...And We Are Impressed

Recovering nicely, Mr. Williams dons a cravat of ebony with pale, creamy yellow stripes so narrow that they are almost like pinstriping. This tie is like a jeweler offering you a lovely array of fine, delicate gold chains spread upon a black velvet display platform. There is a quiet elegance, a sense of the exquisite without the ostentatious, and good taste without stuffiness.

In Which I Must Query As To The Wisdom Of This Latest Selection

Brian stoops to his Lower Tier of Taste and selects the deep orchid cravat with slim white stripes for tonight's cravat. The question is "Why?" Why choose such an obviously Spring/Summer tie? Why opt for one that is reminiscent of those nightmarish ready-made vinyl Easter baskets that one can find at the drugstore containing hideous cello-wrapped "toys" made in far-off banana republics, and by children who are likely tethered to their dangerous and filthy work stations? (And, while I'm on a roll, so to speak, was that the same pale blue shirt and navy sportcoat you were wearing last night?)

Remember June, July, And August? It Would Seem That Brian Does...

In a complete about-face, Brian pays a brief homage to Bygone Summer with tonight's cravat. Its Mediterranean blue background and staggered clusters of three narrow white stripes transport us to warmer months when we lugged our coolers full of icy drinks to the beach, along with our big sunbrellas and our beach totes, ready to catch some rays and bask in the relaxing, cocoa-butter scented ambience that is L'été.

'Tis The Season For This Merry Cravat

Tonight, Brian knots up the most Christmassy tie in his collection, the crimson cravat with ash-colored petite medallions scattered upon it. In the Spirit of the Season, it evokes the image of Santa, home from his Trip at last, his suit still sprinkled with the last few flecks of soot from the chimneys of the many Nice Girls and Boys on his List.

The Only Thing Necessary For The Triumph Of Evil Is For Good Men To...Be Apathetic Regarding Their Cravat Selection*

In spite of the season, Brian dons a member of The Axis Of Evil: The Gadgety Tie.






*title quote with apologies to Edmund Burke

The Purple Pair Provokes A Fit of Pique

If you felt yourself doing one of those Cartoon Eyeball Moments--you know, where you do an exaggerated double-take and your eyeballs remain fixed at the original spot while your head and neck are still whiplashing around--because you could have sworn that Brian just wore this tie day before yesterday, relax. This is the Fashion Twin I spoke of on 10 December and again on 20 October and 23 October when he wore these two cravats in rapid succession. But, whatever. This one, the deep purple with narrow black stripes bordered with pristine white is...oh, forget it. Click the links. Now I'm just irked.

Brian Williams' Not-Quite-Excellent Adventure

The tie selection tonight is the rather strange one of indigo patterned with a miniscule checkerboard or houndstooth of grey that is so subtle that it is almost indistinct. Yet, one can tell that it is there, for it gives this cravat a disappointing trompe l'oeil effect, giving the viewer at first the sinking feeling that Brian, on a sort of Nostalgia Trip, has knotted up one of those horrid knit ties from the Eighties. Dude, that is so bogus.

The Report Waxes Philosophical Regarding Purple And Stripes And Variations On A Theme

A field of dusky plum is crossed by wide black stripes edged in white for tonight's cravat. This is one of Brian's many, many striped and purple ties; indeed, it has a Fashion Twin in deeper violet. Here at The Report, we don't let that stop us from enjoying each offering as a Separate Entity. This one, for example, has a lovely colouration, but its fabric seems stiff and somewhat cheap, causing it to lie oddly. The knot, however--une autre triomphe!

A Warm, Convivial Sort Of Cravat

Debut Tie. A beautiful offering tonight as Brian Williams knots up a deeply saturated silk of rich burgundy with slim burnished gold stripes, widely spaced. The knot is tight and there is no dimple tonight, just a pinch-pleat. Imagine looking down into a gold chalice brimming with mulled wine, the aroma of warm cinnamon, star anise, and nutmeg enveloping you as the rim glints, beckoning you to drink and be merry.

It's Really Two Ties In One--Does Ronco Have A Cravat Line?

Tonight, Brian knots up his Dress It Up/Dress It Down Pseudo-Formal Cravat. The stripes are generous, but not too wide, of deepest navy and pale gold, and it is knotted expertly with a small, centered dimple. This tie is the black skirt in a woman's wardrobe--wear it with a silk shirt, toss on a pair of Italian shoes and some jewelry, and you've got an evening outfit. Put on a sweater and a pair of comfy slip-ons, and you're ready for the office or a conference with Biffy's teacher. It's all about the look.

Jeeves, Get Me My Slippers

Mr. Williams wears a favourite of The Report, the garnet cravat of intarsia silk dotted with widely staggered, petite medallions of ashen ivory rimmed in black. This fabric evokes warmth and relaxation. It is a smoking jacket and a fine cigar in front of a flickering fire, brandy on the table next to the chair, and faithful setter on the rug nearby. Good boy.

A Frosty Cool Cravat

Tonight's cravat is a lovely matte silk from the Purple Collection. But what a Purple! This tie is a frosty scoop of boysenberry sorbet, rich but not overpowering, cool but not pastel. It's a Tie For All Seasons. (And I would be remiss were I not to mention its perfectly sized and centred dimple! Très merveilleux!)

Yes, Brian, There Is Such A Thing As A "Winter Tie"

With the donning of a simple cravat, Brian Williams denies the very existence of December, Winter, and Seasonal Fashion all in one fell swoop. This tie of Microsoft blue with its staggered trios of narrow white stripes is, after all, a Spring/Summer Tie. It looks breezy enough to be the fabric of patio settee throw pillows, or the unisex ascots of cruise ship staff who wander huge blue and white ships while dressed in crisp, snappy-looking white shirts with lots of buttons and tabs and faux epaulets everywhere. This blue and white tie is nautical, brisk, and practically lifted the corner of my afghan as it blew breezily into my home. It's time to put this one--like cork-soled espadrilles and linen pants--away until at least late April.