Unspeakable Adolescent Fantasy Tie

Horrors. What happens when a 13-year old girl who lives in a trailer park next to the railroad plans her dream wedding and chooses the fabric of the groomsmen's ascots to match her bridesmaids' dresses? Naturally, the entire wedding is done in her adolescent favorite colors, dark purple and screaming fuschia. The result is Brian Williams' horrific cravat of deep violet crisscrossed with skinny magenta stripes.