A Very Smart And Snazzy Tie

Brisk and snappy with an air of elitism, that's Brian's tie this evening. Its deep, dark navy silk was crossed with narrow ribbony stripes of pearly white and knotted firmly with a precise dimple. It is a cross between a crewcut military officer and a particularly crisp country club maitre d' who, being told that your party is now five instead of four, raises one eyebrow fleetingly, imperceptibly nods to someone, and in one motion takes up another menu, makes a notation in the book, leans in to speak to your waiter, and hands a long-stemmed red rose to your mother.