Monday, October 5, 2009

Brian Brings Out The Kid In Me, And Not In A Good Way

Hate to be petulant, pet, but I'm downright sick of this cravat. You've slung it on four times now since 11 August, and that's just a bit much. I used to like looking at its midnight blue background and those slim pale pink stripes, but now? I feel like I did when the neighbor lady kept showing up each time my dad slapped sirloins on the grill. She would pull a pouty little face and start whimpering about her kids and her lousy ex-husband and her food stamps. Next thing you know, my steak got smaller. Funny, her kids still wore great-looking shoes and clothes and stopped the popsicle guy every time he came down the street. Put the tie away, Brian, and let me have my steak.