Ah, A Breath Of Fresh Air

Brian Williams relents and knots up a lovely cravat of powdery sky and creamy azure. This tie is a whisper under the clouds at a romantic summer picnic, the soft strains of a violin building to crescendo at an outdoor symphony, and the glimpse of a bluebird on the lamppost at dawn.

And Don't Pretend You Like It Just Because It's Not Purple Or In The AOE

"Hello, designers, and welcome to the New York Department of Transportation's storage warehouse. Today's challenge on Project Runway is to create a men's fashion statement using anything here as your inspiration. It might be a sign, or it might be a vehicle, or anything that creatively moves you. Try not to be too literal in your translation, however. Above all, make it yours, and make it work!"

Not Quite

Brian gives it Another Try tonight, knotting up a cravat of wide stripes in orchid and jet navy. Oh well. He tried. But it's not a good combination. It's like when kids put ketchup on baloney or dip their chicken nuggets in mayonnaise. Sure, they like it, but we all know it's not A Good Thing, and that once their tastes mature and develop, they'll see the error of their ways.

All Sharp Objects Have Been Removed From Report HQ, And The 24-Hour Liquor Store Is #1 On Speed-Dial

Solid Purple Tie. Je n'ai pas de mots.

July: Why We Drink

Clearly, Brian is throwing Caution To The Fashion Winds this month. Not only is he choosing cravats almost exclusively from the Axis Of Evil, he is resorting to the most Reprehensible Repeat Cycles ever. Having just worn the jet navy tie with slender carnation pink stripes on Tuesday, BriWi slings it on again tonight--Thursday, for those of you scoring At Home--innocently raising the ire (and Fashion Hackles) of The Report almost continually during July. The only thing not rising is the level of Three Olives and Noilly Prat in The Report's liquor cabinet.

Being As I Am Taxed Overmuch By Catastrophic Cravats, I Shall Be Sporadic In My July Reporting

Solid Purple Tie. Yes, I know it's periwinkle. But I'm calling it anyway. July is killing me.

The Report Feels An Urgent Need To Recruit A Volunteer Brigade

TWSNLBRAINDTM. July is an absolute Dumpster Fire Of Fashion.

...And Then They Dare To Eat A Peach

Brian Williams knots up his solid magenta silk tie this evening. I feel like this is a sort of J. Alfred Prufrock Tie: This tie is probably in the necktie collection of all Men Of A Certain Age. It's a Midlife Fashion Moment Tie. It's the tie that men suddenly snatch in that brief Devil-May-Care whim after they buy another pair of khaki Dockers and another pair of comfy Rockports and go to yet another dinner at Olive Garden. "Hell no, I'm not in a Middle Age Rut!" they snort derisively. "Looky here at this stylish, bold tie and tell me that I'm not snazzy!"

It Is Nothing Short Of An Act Of Domestic Terrorism

Quelle Horreur! For the second day in a row...Solid Purple Tie.

Unprecedented.

Unforgiveable.

Je suis sans les mots suffisants.

...And The Axis Turns On

What a dreadful turn of events. Solid Purple Tie. (And despite the luscious plummy colour, said SPT was looking none too crisp. Rather...rumply.)

There Are Some Things From Which We Can Never Escape

It was The Report's turn to go On Hiatus, and look what we came home to. TWSNLBRAINDTM. Urgh.